Alt Rock Autumn Day Sixteen: Teenage Dirtbag By Weatus (The Acoustic Version)
Day Sixteen.
Yesterday for day fifteen, I didn’t post because I was strapped for time, but we’re back. For day sixteen, I’ll be looking at one of the most famous rock songs of the past thirty years, but the acoustic version.
Today, I’ll be covering Teenage Dirtbag by Wheatus (the acoustic version).
Teenage Dirtbag came out as the lead single from Wheatus’s self titled debut album on June 20, 2000. It has a true punk anthem title that matches the vibe of its lyrics and blink-182 esque beat; but that’s not the song that I’m covering. I’ll be looking at the acoustic version of Teenage Dirtbag that I cannot get out of my head right now.
Lyrically, the song follows the story of this “teenage dirtbag” that’s in love with a girl who is the opposite of him. He’s unpopular, secluded, and loves listening to Iron Maiden while our girl Noelle is popular, outgoing, and has a boyfriend. The thing is, Noelle doesn’t know anything about our protagonist. “Her name is Noelle, I have a dream about her, She rings my bell, I got gym class in half an hour, Oh, how she rocks, In Keds and tube socks, But she doesn't know who I am, And she doesn't give a damn about me”.
The chorus is so well known and pretty electric. “'Cause I'm just a teenage dirtbag, baby, Yeah, I'm just a teenage dirtbag, baby, Listen to Iron Maiden, baby, with me, ooh”.
Verse two is a bit dicey. Wheatus is describing the Noelles boyfriend and he kind of sounds like an asshole. “Her boyfriend's a dick, And he brings a gun to school, And he'd simply kick, My ass if he knew the truth”. Teenage Dirtbag was released two months after the Columbine shooting, so I find it a bit odd to keep that lyric in the song. It also feels like a large elevation from the guy being a dick to the guy bringing a gun to school.
One of my favorite lyrics though is the rhyming of block and IROC in verse two. “He lives on my block, And he drives an IROC, But he doesn't know who I am, And he doesn't give a damn about me”. The idea of this teenage dirtbag is that he kind of flies under the radar and isn’t noticed by anyone in his daily life.
Verse three is when things take a turn in the favor of our teenage dirtbag. “Man, I feel like mold, It's prom night and I am lonely, Lo and behold, She's walkin' over to me, This must be fake, My lip starts to shake, How does she know who I am?, And why does she give a damn about me?” Hearing this verse is like watching a big play in a football game. You’re thinking, “Oh my God, OH MY GOD IT’S ABOUT TO HAPPEN.”
Noelle gets nice and close and tells our teenage dirtbag “I've got two tickets to Iron Maiden, baby, Come with me Friday, don't say maybe, I'm just a teenage dirtbag, baby, like you”. Now the main reason I adore the acoustic version so much more than the normal version is that when this line comes up, we witness one of the greatest vocal performances ever.
Brendan B. Brown ends “And why does she give a damn about me?” by dropping his voice low then takes a massive deep breath. He then turns his voice very high pitched and sings “I've got two tickets to Iron Maiden, baby, Come with me Friday, don't say maybe, I'm just a teenage dirtbag, baby, like you”. It’s so hypnotic listening to it and for the past two days have had the acoustic version on repeat.
I do find the video very funny because Wheatus recorded the acoustic version two years ago, twenty years following the songs original release and the band members look like if normal band teachers formed their own band. It’s a funny visual, but the song is just an absolute banger.
Another reason I enjoy Teenage Dirtbag so much is that MC Lars has Wheatus sing the Teenage Dirtbag chorus on his song Finite Jest; a song about the book Infinite Jest written by David Foster Wallace.
I’d tell you why MC Lars used the chorus, but it’d be better if he explains it. “So that's the story of "Infinite Jest," all 1079 pages... including the many, many pages of footnotes. That's a synopsis. Basically it's Hamlet, right? Retold through the lens of this kid at a tennis academy in Massachusetts, and then we did the "Teenage Dirtbag" chorus because he's a teenager, and that makes sense, and I want to shout out Wheatus for doing this song with me, and also I recommend you read the book and that's all”. That is the outro from Finite Jest.
Teenage Dirtbag made the top ten on sixteen different charts between 2000 and 2001. It peaked at number one on the Australian chart, Austrian chart, and Belgium chart. It ended 2000 at number two on the Australian chart.